It happened so easily I didn’t even realize it. All the constant messages and demands that life and our culture give us helps create this uneasiness. I see how I am a willing participant in this creation. The feeling that I am always behind, trying to catch up to someone or something. The feeling that if I do a little more, get to that next level, lose that weight, earn that raise etc I will finally get to that place I really want. That place where I can relax, be at peace, feel ready to love and be lovable. You know the feeling? This discomfort shows up in many ways. It shows up in how I see you. It shows up in the way I use my words to push you away. How I secretly or subconsciously tell myself that I am better than this or that. Wait until I reach that mountain top then I’ll show you. My protection shields are up for sure. Just to keep out the feelings of this discomfort.
Then there I was, sitting in the dark, with a candle trying to focus. Trying to slow down the thoughts, the feelings, the fear. I had heard about meditation but never tried it. The idea of it somehow sounded good but I never seemed to take the time to do it. Until now when the urge, the discomfort and some distant memory said it was the solution. So I started, each day for about 10 minutes, in the dark, on my own, for myself.
Guess what happened, the discomfort left and the passion returned.
I became present. I became present to me. To the moment and to deeply buried desires, dreams, ideas that had been covered over. Earmarked for future times. Times when I had my shit together, had enough stored away, had enough of the grind. Then just like that I’d had enough.
I realized that by being present with me this enormous passion for life and the love for each moment came back. It came back so hard that I made a decision. I was going to look at and feel into everything and everyone in my life. A total reassessment, a refresh and detox. Our society calls this a mid-life crisis, I call it a mid-life soul-ution. A combination of a personal revolution, and evolution triggered by my spirit and connection to my source. Sounds whoo-whoo I know and I don’t care. So I let the soul-ution begin.
Presence = passion
The fire is back and I love the feeling of passion. I wondered how many ways can I learn and practice presence in my life? How can I let go of the things and patterns that keep me from being present and add in more of the habits and choices that focus on presence. Things like tv, radio, the news, conversations that focused more on the past, judgements and comparisons you name it I had it. Watching sports and movies had become the norm. Out went the old and in came the new including meditation, yoga, playing, learning new skills including how to be present with other people and myself. How to feel what my heart wants and go with that.
Holy smokes batman!
People felt different, situations seemed less pressured, the feelings of discomfort and anxiety with my life had started to shift. Just by sitting, breathing and noticing my thoughts. I was not even trying to have no thoughts. Aha TRYING. Trying, efforting, making things happen. That was my default mindset. That had served me quite well I had thought. All that I was, had or did was based on the principle of effort, never giving up, no pain no gain. So I thought.
Then there it was. THOUGHT. The thought that I had kept thinking became the belief. My beliefs came my state of being. So if I could change my thoughts I could change my beliefs into whatever I wanted. It was around about this time that I discovered Abraham Hicks and the Law of Attraction. I watched the movie the Secret and I decided to experiment.
My experiment was if everything was from the same source and source is love then how much love could I feel, give, share, and spread. I wanted to find out if love was the Soul-lution. The solution to my own internal discomfort, my discomfort for other people and situations I did not like.
As soon as I said these words it felt like my heart exploded and relief flooded my body.
It was like putting my hand in a light socket. I literally could not sleep, my body shook, trembled and felt like it was electric. I knew. I knew beyond doubt that this is what I must do. This was my calling. Feel and spread love. Listen to my body, my heart, and my soul. The passion was back. The passion was the presence and the presence the fuel for the passion.
Cultivate presence in your own life. Cultivate presence with your partner, your kids, your career. It is not as hard as you think. Ahhh, I think. If you think it will be hard then of course it will. New thought, it will be easy. Easy to be present, to love, to share, to feel joy.
Remarkable things happen. When I started to become present with my desires, my own self love, my connection to that thread of source that connects everything things happen. Happen in the way I want them to happen. Even when they don’t seem to happen perfectly I know they are perfect. Perfectly unfolding for my soul-lution, growth and fulfillment in this life.
So these things are some of my passion. Feeling them in my own life and helping others feel their own passion. Especially in the area of love, and the early stages of relationships including dating and the desire for partnership as a spiritual path to love and the connection to that highest part of the all.
Create your own experiment.
Practice presence - meditate for 10 minutes a day to start. Be fully present with your lover. Put the devices away and really see each other. Ask how the day was and listen. Tell them what you heard. Watch what happens. Your partner will surrender more fully to the truth that you are with them. That you really care. That they matter to you. When that happens the passion comes. It stays alive and keeps growing. It blossoms like blooms and lasts. We want that for you.
This is the truth that all our work is built on. When we are present love grows.
It’s all here.
Can you feel it?