One of the Sexiest Traits Most People Don't Know [but you could start having it now]

One of the Sexiest Traits Most People Don't Know [but you could start having it now]

More than eye color, a full head of hair, height, wrinkle free skin, or tight bod - the trait that actually makes a person want you is mindfulness.

Yep! Just simply being present is one of the most attractive qualities a person can exude.

It seems like a growing number of people are reporting to have ADD or ADHD - and whether it's self-diagnosed or official - I would say everyone on the planet has some level of attention deficit.

In our fast-paced, jam-packed modern day we're actually practicing to have short attention spans. Between being able to fill idol time in a grocery line with a simple glance at the phone or getting completely engrossed in watching the news where you've got the people telling you something, you can read the breaking news headline at the lower third of the screen, the stock ticker across the top, the weather in the corner, and commercial invasions - GAH! - our attention is getting more and more used to constant [and stressful] stimulation. And sadly, our attention is also getting less and less tolerant of slower, intimate kind of stimulation like talking to a real life human being. 

21 Ways to Attract True Love this Valentine's Day

21 Ways to Attract True Love this Valentine's Day

Here are some great ideas to try this Valentine's Day in order to mix it up. I know how hard it might seem that everyone is out having fun and in love with a partner but for many people it's not like that. So instead of focusing on what's not here how about creating a new experience that feels better. Not only will it be of service to others but you will create new neuro-pathways to love in your our experience. Putting your attention on what feels good for others or yourself helps prepare your garden for more love in all areas of life. Here is the article from Emily John over at the Huffington Post:

Is your sexual shadow keeping you from letting your soulmate in? Take the quiz

Is your sexual shadow keeping you from letting your soulmate in? Take the quiz

Many people won’t even put themselves out there, period, because of sex and the fears, lack of confidence and tabooness that surrounds it. Some brave souls DO put themselves out there and have lots of great qualities, but their efforts go nowhere because they’re not in vibrational alignment with their sexuality They’re not vibrationally ready for the things that come with the deeper physical intimacy of partnership.

In other words - you could be the hottest, smartest, richest, funnest, most conscious communicating fish in the sea; but if you’re vibration is wonky about sex, you might actually be resisting the partner you seek.

How to Master the Art of the Compliment to Inspire Real Connection

How to Master the Art of the Compliment to Inspire Real Connection

Compliments are an all-too-often misused attempt at casting a rod to see if they bite. It's a great idea, in theory. But here I'm gonna explain why it doesn't work and how you can make a little adjustment that's going to feel really good to you regardless of where the connection goes.

So, you're at your favorite coffee shop standing in line and behind you walks up this human who's got eyes you could dive into, a smile that's making you melt, and hair that you'd like to see in your bed tomorrow morning.

First of all - you're not gonna say all that. Second - you don't even know if they're single! But - you just can't possibly wait in this line with such proximity to an opportunity without at least trying. So what do you do?

Evolve Dating Code

Evolve Dating Code

Imagine being vulnerable enough to put your heart out there to meet someone new knowing that they would treat you exactly the way you'd want to be treated, regardless of wanting to move forward. We've interviewed hundreds of conscious, heart-centered lovers to find out what most people want in ideal modern dating etiquette. 

So, here it is - the code. The Evolve Dating Code.

The Best Online Dating Sites Review you will ever read

The Best Online Dating Sites Review you will ever read

Almost everybody dating today has used online dating sites or apps to find love. But let's face it - most people hate doing online dating for various reasons from the time it takes to the fears of weirdos and stalkers to name a few. At Evolve Dating Gurus we believe that once you are in the right frame of mind and aligned with your own love frequency, then online apps can be a great resource to attract your person. We think it can definitely be part of your 2017 vision board plan for finding new love.

To get you kick-started we wanted to bring to you a review that we think is awesome! It will save you all the time and effort of figuring out this shizz on your own. You or we could spend years doing the research, analyzation and crunching of the numbers - but why do that when the folks over at reviews.com did it for us already.

"Men Should Pay" and Step by Step What To Do [Part 3 of 3]

"Men Should Pay" and Step by Step What To Do [Part 3 of 3]

No matter what your thoughts or feelings on the issue of men paying on dates, guess what? No one is right or wrong! If you're a woman who wants a guy who’s gonna take charge, open doors and pay for meals and be the old school dude that you dream about - great! If you're the type of woman who prefers a guy who offers to go dutch or wants equal contribution back and forth - awesome! Own what you want with consciousness and complete conviction, and you will attract your match with much more ease.

"Men Should Pay" and Thoughts to consider for Heterosexual Men [Part 2 of 3]

"Men Should Pay" and Thoughts to consider for Heterosexual Men [Part 2 of 3]

The question: “Should the man pay?” is like a fat, juicy pimple. As soon as it’s popped, it’s a shit show of a mess with no satisfaction. It’s a question where all kinds of people show up and wave their opinion flag whether they’re a chivalrous type, a know-it-all, a feminist, misogynist, traditionalist, or a supposed conscious couple, like us!

We are writing this in response to the many articles out there that give a black and white answer to this question that’s at least 51 shades of gray. We feel disheartened by the lack of guidance towards cultivating inner wisdom. And so here we are - writing something for men and women to consider in order to come to their own answer.

Refer your Clients to a Matchmaker: Top 10 Reasons

Refer your Clients to a Matchmaker: Top 10 Reasons

I am now a dating coach and matchmaker, but it wasn't always that way; I actually started out as a psychotherapist and before that, I was a personal trainer. As a therapist and trainer, I worked with many single clients who I came to know quite well after some time and was always thinking things like, "Man, I know someone who'd be perfect for my client!" or "I wish it was appropriate for me to help my client with their online dating profile!" Every time with my single clients, some portion of the session would be devoted to talking about the latest dating situation: Either they went on a horrible date, went on an amazing date, decided to write off dating altogether, or just expressed their deep confusion about modern dating.

How to Talk about Sex in the Conscious Dating World

How to Talk about Sex in the Conscious Dating World

My eyes slowly peel open into a blurred version of a room. Turning my head on the pillow as quietly as possible, I face towards...Fuck! Who’s that? I scrunch up my face in partial disgust but also in my efforting to dig through a substance soggy mind for literally any images of the night before. Nothing. Verrrrry sloooooowly and carefully, I slip out from the covers and look down. Shit. I’m naked. That was me a few years ago in my pre-conscious life as a not so spiritual single. Yep, there were times when I really didn’t know if I had sex. I was on something literally every single day at that point: food, alcohol, drugs, men.

"Men Should Pay" and Thoughts to consider for Heterosexual Women [Part 1 of 3]

"Men Should Pay" and Thoughts to consider for Heterosexual Women [Part 1 of 3]

he question: “Should the man pay?” is like a fat, juicy pimple. As soon as it’s popped, it’s a shit show of a mess with no satisfaction. It’s a question where all kinds of people show up and wave their opinion flag whether they’re a chivalrous type, a know-it-all, a feminist, misogynist, traditionalist, or a supposed conscious couple, like us!

We are writing this in response to the many articles out there that give a black and white answer to this question that’s at least 51 shades of gray. We feel disheartened by the lack of guidance towards cultivating inner wisdom. And so here we are - writing something for men and women to consider in order to come to their own answer.

How do I know if I am investing in the right relationship?

How do I know if I am investing in the right relationship?

This is a very common question we get asked. The story goes, I am tired of spending my time and effort getting to know someone only for it to not work out and having to start all over again. Can you help me fix this, because I am over it?

Now we could give you some of the typical dating advice answers out there on how to determine if your person is the right one for you, or how to avoid the losers but that’s not what this article is about.

To truly change the feeling of dating being a waste of time or an exercise in pain you need to change your attitude about it. Conscious, Smart, Sexy people listen up.  We invite you to challenge the idea of investing in love as if it is a commodity. Like it’s a business transaction with a guaranteed outcome. If you want to attract your soulmate and grow the relationship so that it's built to last then your beliefs might need a little upgrade.

How Gender Stereotypes Hurt Your Chance of Finding Love

How Gender Stereotypes Hurt Your Chance of Finding Love

There’s all kinds of gender and sex-informed rules for dating - and if you’re still following them, you may be single because of it. Even if you don’t think you’re still following them because you’re in “conscious” community - you might be...unconsciously. Below are some partial descriptions of some of the people we’ve worked with over the years in our dating coaching and matchmaking business. Here’s a quick pop quiz for you: Go through the descriptions and guess the person’s gender and sex as quickly as you can. Make sure that you cover up the Gender/Sex column.

I just got the most random sex call ever, it's not what you think

I just got the most random sex call ever, it's not what you think

So I am laying on my sofa relaxing after a full on active day and the phone rings. It is not a number I recognize but my whole body says answer it, so I do. The voice asks is this the help line? Curiously ,instead of saying no you have the wrong number I ask what kind of help is he looking for? He says he had something happen last night and he needs to talk about it because he can't stop thinking about it. Instead of getting the university's help line like the caller thought, somehow he got me.

In a strange twist the universe decided to connect Stephen with me Chris DeCicco a dating coach, and relationship and intimacy guide, who happens to be an lgbt advocate and a being who the fuck you are kinda guy. I had to laugh at the irony of it.

"Just Be Yourself": It's Only Shitty Dating Advice When You Don't Know These 'How-to' Steps

"Just Be Yourself": It's Only Shitty Dating Advice When You Don't Know These 'How-to' Steps

With a lifetime of conditioning, people-pleasing, and trying to be liked, one day I realized you have to be yourself when dating to attract Mr. Right. So many people begin to ask "who am I?" especially in the dating world because you gotta answer that question in so many ways - by filling out your online dating profile, during typical getting-to-know-you conversation, and as you're trying to determine if who you think you are is a good match for whom you think is the person across from you. Being ourselves has become a lost art in a world where it seems like being someone else is the only way to get ahead. But I promise you, that’s only what it seems because in the long run being someone else always has negative consequences.

Finding resonance with my own soul helped me to love you

Finding resonance with my own soul helped me to love you

It happened so easily I didn’t even realize it. All the constant messages and demands that life and our culture give us helps create this uneasiness. I see how I am a willing participant in this creation. The feeling that I am always behind, trying to catch up to someone or something. The feeling that if I do a little more, get to that next level, lose that weight, earn that raise etc I will finally get to that place I really want. That place where I can relax, be at peace, feel ready to love and be lovable. You know the feeling? This discomfort shows up in many ways. It shows up in how I see you. It shows up in the way I use my words to push you away. How I secretly or subconsciously tell myself that I am better than this or that. Wait until I reach that mountain top then I’ll show you. My protection shields are up for sure. Just to keep out the feelings of this discomfort.

The Boulderist Podcast Interviews Evolve Dating Guru

L. O. V. E. Find true love, the Boulder way. The Soulmate Matchmakers take the guesswork out of dating. Evolve Dating Gurus Chris Decicco and Kendra Seoane are powerhouses of joy who “serve conscious-heart centered-willing people who want real connection that lasts.”  Kendra and Chris have a unique method for helping people cultivate their own authentic confidence and build sustainable relationships. Find your true love – have a listen by clicking the link below.

The Boulderist Podcast Interview with Kendra Seoane and Chris DeCicco

Why Not me?... Your Response to Others’ Dating Success and Finding Love Could be a Reason

Why Not me?... Your Response to Others’ Dating Success and Finding Love Could be a Reason

Did you hear about Casey and Nancy? They’ve updated their relationship status on facebook and deactivated their Tinder accounts! As your friend starts to elaborate on yet another friend that’s found love, what is the feeling that comes over you? Your response to others getting hitched can be an important indicator of your vibration relative to finding your own match.

Read to the bottom because we’re gonna give you two quick quizzes and a practice that could have you announcing your newfound love to all your friends.

Ghosting: The easy way out of losing interest?

Ghosting: The easy way out of losing interest?

Ghosting. If you're in the dating world, maybe you've had it done to you. Hell, maybe you've done it to someone else. No judgement here - but let's talk about it for a sec.

In case you're like - "wait...are we talking about your house being haunted?" No. It's not that.

Ghosting is when you've been on a few dates, it's been going pretty well, and suddenly one person drops all communication. Abruptly. No explanation. Nothing. Poof! Gone!

I think the reasons for this phenomenon totally make sense. And it doesn't automatically mean the person's who's doing it is an asshole. But! If you're wanting to attract a conscious relationship - we've laid out some other options for ending it. Plus - if someone does it to you, we have a few suggestions for dealing.

My Experience in Prison

My Experience in Prison

  For the last few weeks, Chris and I have been volunteering at the Denver Women’s Correctional facility along with our amazing mentors at Turning the Wheel. On the ride there the first night, I was told, “Make sure to be polite. We’re going to be dealing with policemen, so we need to just follow instructions, be polite, say ‘please’ and ‘thank you.’” I thought to myself: Yeah, of course. I don’t need the reminder.

Then I'm told that DWCF has the highest rate of reported staff sexual assault. Immediately my rebel was like: Oh, if ANY of those cops so much as give me a LOOK, I swear! But then I was like: No, no. Take a breath. There is no way for me to know who has done what. Put your attention on the group we're serving - not the cops. And then my mind started playing out scenarios - very unlikely scenarios - like me finding out the cops who do this and somehow rescuing all the people who have been affected.

Shit. I don’t think I’m ready for this just yet.